killing time

both fists raised to the bar, tucking stolen cigarettes in sleeves, wrapping lips around cold calm collected bottles of post partum depression... how much can pass in the dark light of a southern drawl between country's greatest hits..

i say it one last time for you, then we really have to go...

a boy walks in to a bar with a backpack and a guitar slapped on his back, stop me if you've heard this one before.... we clap along... we bounce to rhythms we don't know.. i file words away to the back of my brain to save for the late night tea sips and pen marks.. come in late, round two ae em, hope for a late night glimmer of hope, dreamt a bout a funeral pyre last night and i couldn't stop thinking about how my u keeps sticking... i brush up my teeth after sinking into labourous sleep.. my sheets are stale with hurt, smoke stains, and skin sweat out alcohol...i've black marks on my arm, ash in sleep mascara in light...

i will let you down, i will make you hurt..

i wash it all off in oranges and cover white dew with flowers from her childhood.. i listen to johnny cash sing what have i become, my sweetest friend i repeat. repeat. repeat. repent.

When you are kissing someone who is too much like you it's like kissing on a mirror, when you're sleeping with someone who doesn't get you, you're going to hate yourself in the morning...

I can't get songs out of my head